Leading internships with AssistU Virtual Assistants is a pure joy for me.

It’s work, don’t get me wrong… I generally spend twice the time it would take me to do the work myself when I am teaching them things. But, really, that isn’t the hard part.

Learning to change hats is the hard part.

See, many fresh VA’s are leaving a corporate job and an employee/employer relationship. They are still acting as employees.

I got past that a while ago. I understand what it means to stand up for myself and for the client at the same time and be present in the relationship as a partner rather than an employee. It means taking the helm from time to time… following the course the client has set. I am now comfortable in that role and while I can always improve… it’s becoming more natural to me now.

When I work with a new intern, I have to nurture that out of them. It’s tough to be a leader/partner with clients, teach and lead an internship, and show up in a way that allows the intern to be a leader/partner so they can build that muscle.

My Interns, My Partners

Really, it is the reason I want to lead these internships. When I graduated from AssistU in 2011, I worked with 2010 AssistU VA of the Year Larissa Parks as her intern. She taught me so much. She didn’t let me slide into showing up as an employee. I am grateful for that.

The following summer, Anastacia Brice offered an internship and it was not only right up my alley in content management, who wouldn’t want a chance to learn from her?

Anastacia also got me to build that partner muscle. She taught me to say what needs to be said… because not saying it only makes it worse later. I grew even more.

Ironically, leading the internships now gets me to grow yet again. Knowing that while I show up for my clients by being a strong partner makes them feel safe, showing up in that same way with an intern makes them feel like an employee… the last thing I want them to be. I am learning to dance with it. Knowing when to ask, when to tell, when to follow, when to lead. It’s like learning a new language and tripping all over the other ones you already know. It can be awkward and I make mistakes. Lucky for me… when I do I get to see if the intern shows up with her big girl panties on and stands up for herself.

If she does, I get to applaud her and reinforce it. If she doesn’t, I get to call her out on it and have a deeper conversation. Really, when I mess up it is a win/win, but I prefer planning it than the feeling I get when it happens organically because I am being assertive in the wrong way.

Standing up as a leader and a partner means many things, but most often it means saying the thing that needs to be said regardless of how it might make me feel when I am saying it. Whether it’s discussing a higher retainer because of the discomfort of being unavailable when a client needs to go over hours on a lower one, working out who will do what in an absence because I have a right to take time off when I want to, or up-holdng my own standards with my interns but in a way that allows them the opportunity to say out-loud that those standards conflict with their own… it is all a dance we must learn the steps to if we want to grow in relationship.

And, it’s such a great dance with the right partner.

How do you show up in your partnerships?